Flirty vs. Interested

A while back, I posted my response to a thread on my favorite messageboard. The thread was about a woman who met a tragic end due to domestic violence. I was moved by my own words and wanted to share them. And so, I'm sharing again. The reply below is to a thread that asked how to tell the difference between the actions of a guy who was interested in you versus the actions of a guy who was simply flirting. I'm no expert on relationships (as you may have surmised by now), but I think I have some good insight into many aspects of them.

"I think you can tell a lot by: 1) his gaze and 2) how much time he spends with you. The most obvious one is the time spent. If he doesn't make it a habit to be in anyone's face a lot but yours, there's a chance that it might be legitimate interest. Contrast that with the flirty guy who makes the rounds trying to keep all the ladies smiling and is always seen with a different one. Next up is the intensity of the gaze. If he's the office flirt, his eye contact won't be that serious or attentive, his attention span will be short as he's looking all around to see who he should talk to next. But the guy who's interested holds your gaze and you feel warm, there's something he's saying without even speaking. People can pass by and he won't even look to see who it is. You just know the difference.

Men are very difficult to figure out. Good luck."



So, do you think I got it right?

Check Out My New Article

I wrote an article titled "The Benefits of a Workplace Mentor" that will appear in Thursday Network's Fall 2010 newsletter, scheduled for publishing later this year. Thursday Network is the Washington DC chapter of the National Urban League Young Professionals. This is my second contribution to the newsletter. I wrote "Maintaining Relationships During Economic Hardships" for their Summer 2010 issue.

You can read them both on the writing and editing page of my website, www.jennifersingleton.net.

Please visit Thursday Network's website to learn about the organization's mission and community service accomplishments in the DC area.

Calling All Fiction Writers!!

A few years ago, I began submitting a couple of my short stories to every decent-sounding writing contest I could find. I wanted to know if I had "it." A writing style and story line so refreshing and intriguing that contest judges would suspend further reviews after reading what I had to say. I am a dreamer what can I say. I suppose I faired better than most, having received an Honorable Mention from the Shrine of the Black Madonna Bookstore for my story Unspoken Duty. Check it out here, under "Fiction Writing Sample." After a while I began to feel discouraged (and those entry fees started to add up). Thus began my hiatus. Today I feel I'm ready to re-enter the writing contest ring. I have some new work that I feel is competition-worthy.

I kept a list of contests I had entered in the past and looked them up so see if they were still around. A few of them were. While searching for others I realized I wanted to share some of them in the hope it would inspire someone else to want unveil a story hidden on a flash drive or on the pages of a forgotten notebook. The deadlines for these contests are coming up, so act now, or pass along to a friend who may need a little encouragement.

John Steinbeck Short Story Award
Prize: One winner will receive $1000 and publication in Reed Magazine.
Entry fee: $15 (entrants receive a copy of the prize issue)
Word count: no more than 6000
Deadline: November 1, 2010
For details visit http://www.reedmag.com/

Roanoke Review
Prize: One winner will receive $1000 and publication in Roanoke Review.
Entry fee: $15
Word count: no more than 5000
Deadline: November 8, 2010
For details visit http://www.roanokereview.wordpress.com/

Tampa Review, Danahy Fiction Prize
Prize: One winner will receive $1000 and publication in Tampa Review.
Entry fee: $15 (entrants receive a subscription to Tampa Review)
Word count: between 500 and 5000
Deadline: November 1, 2010
For details visit www.ut.edu/tampareview

The Writing Site, Arthur Edelstein Prize for Short Fiction
Prize: One winner will receive $1000 and publication on http://www.writingsite.com/.
Entry fee: $10
Word count: no more than 6000
Deadline: October 31, 2010
For details visit http://www.writingsite.com/

Narrative Magazine, 30 Below Contest
Prize: One winner will receive $1500 for a short story, essay, or excerpt from a work of fiction or creative fiction by a writer under 30.
Entry fee: $20
Word count: up to 15,000
Deadline: October 31, 2010
For details visit http://www.narrativemagazine.com/

Inkwell Short Fiction Contest
Prize: One winner will receive $1500 for up to 3 short stories.
Entry fee: $15
Word count: no more than 5000
Deadline: October 30, 2010
For details visit http://www.inkwelljournal.org/

Kore Press Short Fiction Award
Prize: One winner will receive $1000 and publication by Kore Press.
Entry fee: $15
Word count: 4000-12,000
For details visit http://www.korepress.org/


In addition to finding writing contests online, you can visit your local library and bookstore for the latest issues of literary magazines and journals. Poets & Writers magazine is an excellent resource for contests and grants. Also contact college and university English departments to see if any of their publications are sponsoring writing competitions.

A word of caution: Sadly not all writing contests are created equal. Research, researh, research, especially the reviews of previous contest entrants, before entering a particular competition; and read the contest guidelines very carefully. Be sure to ask for clarification on terminology you do not understand, particularly the term "right of first publication."

And lastly, if you enter one of the above contests and win, place, or receive an honorable mention, please come back and let me know. I'd be happy to share your news.


Happy writing,

Jennifer Singleton

Introducing "A Book a Month"

Here's how this is going to work. Each month, starting September 2010, for as long as I can muster the motivation, I will select a book that intrigues me and read it. Ordinarily this isn't a big deal, as I've been known to tackle several good reads in a month's span. What's different is that I'll publish a review of this book on my website www.jennifersingleton.net
on the first (or second) of the following month. I'll let you know when it's ready.

Why am I doing this?

For two reasons: 1) to ensure that my site contains current and diverse writing samples, and 2) to discipline myself by serving as my own editor. I've set deadlines for myself with the understanding that if I can't do right by myself, then I can't do right by anyone else. I've never challenged myself like this before, and the decision to do it has come after a long period of feeling sorry for myself and neglecting to channel the creative energy that inhabits my soul.

September's selection if you haven't guessed by the book jacket is Richard Wright's The Outsider. Two of Wright's titles, Native Son and Black Boy, were required readings in my 10th grade English class. I was so intrigued by Wright's writing style and the adversity his characters faced that when I saw The Outsider in Barnes & Noble, I knew I couldn't leave the store without it. I only hope that I can give the story's protagonist, Cross Damon, justice. Based on what I've read so far, I'm completely mesmerized. Wright hooked me from the first page and he refuses to let me go. When a writer can make a reader experience the emotions I'm experiencing, he or she deserves a standing ovation. Though in reply to this compliment, I can imagine that most of them would say, "I'm just reporting the story as my spirit instructed me to."

Wish me luck. I hope to create something you find interesting. Just knowing someone out there will anticipate it and will check back encourages me more than you know.