October 5, 2013

Becoming a mom and other stuff

I'll be giving birth in 5 weeks and I'm incredibly  nervous about it. My life has changed so much over the past year I haven't had a chance to catch my breath. And now this. This is my first time admitting it on social media. I'm pregnant. I'm having a little boy. He'll be here next month. I hope I'll be a good mom. I know so little about it. I've been told that it'll come naturally. We'll see. I have a lot to give. But have never had to give it in this capacity.

I got married earlier this year, and while I'm still trying to understand what this marriage thing is all about. So much for my editor and writer musings I suppose. I've been so consumed with everything else. But one good thing is that my little brain is constantly observing the interesting things of my world.

I live mere minutes from the decision makers who are battling over who will win the government shutdown (yes, one side will "win" and the other will "lose"); the scene of the Navy Yard shootings that made headlines about two weeks ago; the woman who drove from Connecticut to DC and due to her bizarre actions lost her life; and most recently the poor man who set himself on fire on the National Mall and later succumbed to his injuries. This past month has been very emotionally trying in this area.

I feel very fortunate that, despite all the anxiety I've been feeling, I'm in a good place and I have a lot to look forward to. With so much going on in the world, I'm just happy to have my sanity (though it wanes a bit) to guide me through. I'm happy to have love. I'm happy to have a job where I feel somewhat needed. And I'm happy that I can look back on some rough times I've had the past few years and am now embarking on a journey I never imagined.

I'll be back with updates.