I wasn’t popular in high school. There are a number of reasons I wasn’t. I didn’t wear name brand clothes; I didn’t associate with any cliques; I didn’t live in a nice subdivision like the majority of my classmates, but in an apartment in the city’s housing authority; I created my own unique hairstyles that didn’t conform; I was quite; and just didn’t fit in. However, during my junior year, I transferred to another school where I met some great people who accepted me the way I was and actually liked me. I wasn’t such a loser anymore. It was a great feeling.
Mine is considered a success story compared to the suffering that many other kids go through. I wasn’t obese; considered unattractive, or conversely, too pretty; didn't wear dirty, tattered clothing; and as far anyone could tell, was a cookie cutter heterosexual. Passing these big hurdles allowed me to pass through my middle and high school years unscathed. Not so for many others.
Bullying has dominated the news in recent weeks. A 12-year-old girl's father made headlines after he boarded a bus and yelled at his mentally challenged daughter's tormentors. A 13-year-old girl hung herself after nude pics she texted to her boyfriend ended up in the hands of menacing classmates. A Rutgers University freshman killed himself after his homosexual encounter was broadcast over the internet by his roommate. My sympathies to all who have and who will be the victims of taunting and bullying from either an acquaintance or an anonymous attacker.
The old adage "kids can be cruel" has taken on a different meaning as technology has advanced. Even before these stories hit the news, I pondered what today's grade schools were like. What was it like now to be an unpopular, bullied kid. Back in my day, if someone didn't like you, they told you to your face, there weren't any social networking sites to hide behind. Mean notes were written about you and passed around; a bully may have told you to meet him after school—all awful things to experience. However, back then, when a victim of such actions went home, they had escaped, at least for a little while. And if it got too bad to endure, they could transfer schools, and start over. Now, victims are forced to face their hurt 24/7. And these hurtful things, be them malicious blogs, Facebook, and Twitter pages, or humiliating camera phone videos and pics, can follow them for years.
Technological advancements are amazing and inspiring and have changed millions of lives for the better; and with each year are becoming a necessity rather than a luxury. However, these very things we rely on to entertain, educate, and motivate ourselves are the tools of torment for far too many. To you, gentle readers, and anyone else affected by such cruelties, my deepest sympathies, and wishes for you to stay strong and hold on.
In closing, I want to share an article I wrote on cyberbullying for the December 2009/January 2010 issue of Educational Leadership, published by ASCD. Read it here.
Bullies are heartless cowards while doings such acts, and most bullies I believe grow out of this behavior and feel remorse for their deeds done while young. Unfortunately, their are bullies that never feel sadness or remorse for their deeds and continue this despicable behavior into their adult lives until that fateful day when their deeds finally catches up with them and the table turns. It always does.
ReplyDeleteAnd sadly too is cyberbullying. The internet is giving the bully an even bigger stick to whip their prey.