I had to say something

My friend texted me this morning that a Baton Rouge man's shooting was "hard to watch." I didn't know what she was talking about, I was still on the train heading in to work and rarely have time to catch the news while rushing out to work.. Being from Baton Rouge, LA, I was naturally curious and immediately went online to see what had occurred.

I then saw his face. A face that reminded me of men I've met along this journey called life. His gold teeth caught my attention first. Yep, he's from home I thought. Gold teeth is something I grew up seeing and I associate them with the South, with Louisiana--with home. I didn't realize until I left home that gold teeth were considered "ghetto" or something only "backwards blacks" in the South wore. The men and women I knew with gold teeth were smart, hardworking, and very prideful people who wore them as a form of cultural expression. Perhaps people outside of the area simply couldn't understand our culture outside of jambalaya and gumbo, I thought, and didn't appreciate what a special people we were.

I read with growing sorrow of what happened to Alton Sterling and couldn't bring myself to watch the video, though the warnings of "Graphic," and "Not safe for work" let me know it was a little different than the other shootings that made the news.

It was. It was gut wrenching to realize this man's final moments as he lay restrained. The fear he must have felt, the helplessness....the bullets ripping through his flesh.

I've been emotional all day. Hundreds of murders every year. I would say like most people in this country, I have become somewhat desensitized. Bullet-riddled bodies drop to the pavement every single day across America. So why is this guy different?

For me, it was his face. We're around the same age, I wondered if we'd ever crossed paths. I had a personal connection to this man and to this place. North Foster Boulevard. My mother and I drove up and down that road hundreds of times. He could have been my uncle who lives near the shooting. My uncle is not a rich man, he's a musician who supports himself doing odd jobs. That could have been him selling cds to make ends meet.

He could have been my cousin.

I still can't bring myself to watch the full video. It's just too much for me right now. Lately I've just been more susceptible than usual to bad news and am working to make space for more positive energy. But when your mornings start like this, it's a little hard

I saw his son break down during a press conference today. At 15 and just entering young adulthood, a boy needs his father. I hope there is a village willing to step in and provide him the guidance he will need.

I hugged my two sons a little tighter when I got home. They are so innocent and have no idea what the world is like. I don't want them to find out, but I know they have to. We all have to learn the truth.

That tomorrow is not promised. Life is not fair. People do bad things. And we will never figure out why.

Good night.

Sunday nights since March 2014

It's Sunday night. I'm at the laptop with two class assignments due by 11:59 p.m. As I write this post the time is 7:27 p.m.

Most Sundays night since March 2014 have ended up the same way. Down to the wire, trying to finish an assignment that I had no time to complete during the work week. This is one of those Sundays. The kids are away at a cookout (wait a minute, it's the 4th of July weekend and I'm doing school work). So you'd think that would leave me ample time to get work done. Wrong.

I'm stuck on a journal assignment that I don't quite understand. Here's the prompt:

After reviewing this module’s resources, compare and contrast Rory Sutherland’s concept of “frame of reference” marketing to that of expensive and magnificent solutions. Assess the ideal of branding and rebranding through “positioning” and “frame of reference.”

Now one of my texts, Kellogg on Branding, speaks of frame of reference from a marketing perspective and defines it as "a statement of the target's goal that will be served by consuming the brand....the frame of reference may guide the choice of targets, identify situations in which the brand might be used, and define relevant competitors."

Okay, I think I got that. However, Rory Sutherland's "frame of reference" TED Talk focuses on how situations can be reframed to provide a different perception. One example he provides is saying "I'm unemployed" versus "I'm taking a year off." The situation is the same...not having a job. But the latter's perception is that of choice or having the ability to take a year off and not needing a job. 

So what I'm trying to do is apply this concept to marketing and I'm having a hard time. 

Oh well, let me get back to work. I actually have an integrated marketing plan to also finalize. 

My master's is so close I can almost taste it!

Black Confessions and Bronze Thrills: Black romance magazines (cont'd)

Some years back I wrote a blog post on the black romance magazines. It was an ode to my hormonal teenage years when I desperately sought out anything that could offer me a preview of what was in store for me when I "got grown."

While I loved them dearly, I was critical of the glaring editorial errors that sometimes made a story unreadable. But I continued to buy them because they were special to me and captivated me, and helped me realize that I too wanted to write stories.

Well years later, I still have most of those magazines. The ones from the 90s are worn, and a couple are missing their covers, but everything else is in tact. I didn't realize the response I'd receive from that post.

I've received feedback from people directly involved with these magazines and it inspired to me highlight these publications once again.

These days, women who enjoy black romance are no longer able to go to the grocery store and pick these up (correct me if I'm wrong). We have websites we can go to for black erotica. And of course, we have gritty, raunchy urban lit books. But not these magazines.

Please let me (and others) know if there are any equivalents out there. It's amazing how much we have available to us now through social media, blogs, sites, and apps....yet some things remain hard to come by. Like magazines that let us live vicariously through the sex and love lives of characters, who much like ourselves, are just trying to figure out this thing called love.

Before I go, I want to give a shout out to the ads these magazines used to have. How many of you remember the lucky talismans, the love potients, the padded underwear, the psychics and healers, the wigs and hair pieces? It's a little funny now to look at these ads and not see a website or an '@' address to follow them on Twitter and Instagram. Just a PO Pox and a phone number.

One small step for writers-kind

Boy have I been neglecting this blog. The thing I started as a creative release has become pushed to the side as I juggled work, school, my pursuits of professional development, and being a mom to my two and half year old and my almost one-year old. I've been busy. But not that busy. One should never give up the things that give them release and make them happy. My writing has always been that. This post marks my one small step back.

Do You Have a Card?

I went to a networking event tonight for government communicators at a nice restaurant in Downtown DC and was the only one there without an official business card. At my job, if you don't interact with the public, then you don't get a company business card. I find this very unfortunate. My communications functions are internal, relegated to my fellow employees only (e.g., newsletter, emails, intranet content management, etc.). My customers at work know who I am, and if they don't, a simple Outlook search will yield my names and title. But there's something about a business card. It helps to build your brand. It helps promote your organization. It serves as a verifier of your knowledge, skills, and abilities to your peers. This last part, serving as a verifier, is what I feel is most important. Tonight I had to pass out my personal card. Nothing is wrong with it, in fact, a senior communications official commented that it was cute. But I don't want a cute card. I want card from my organization so that I have proof that I work where I say I work. A card that joins a professional rolodex. But those are the rules. I only communicate internally. No card with embossed with the company seal for me. I find this very unfortunate.

National Association of Government Communicators - 2014 Communication School

I attended the NAGC's 2014 Communications School and was thoroughly pleased with all I learned. It was just what I needed to re-energize my professional pursuits. My responsibilities during the day at my job and my new responsibilities as a mommy have left my head spinning in terms of how to get back on track with my professional development. I never want to get so comfortable in one situation that I fail to take notice of the advancements occurring in my communications field, and of course, new opportunities to grow and learn.

I'm responsible for creating and implementing communication plans. It can be very challenging because each plan is different and requires different strategies, or at least a different way to communicate to the project managers. Listening to the best practices of some of the country's top communicators gave me insight into some new strategies I can use back at the office.

Things I've Been Wondering About

I have a lot of random thoughts throughout my day, as do most folks I suppose. Sometimes I use Google to find the answers or to at least see if there are others who are wondering the same thing.

Here's a few of my musings as of late:

1. Why do people place their bags on the seat next to them when riding public transit? Are they hoping no one sits next to them? How dare they hog a seat they haven't paid for.

2. Why don't people invest in a good pair of headphones, ones that actually go into the ear, so that I'm not forced to hear their music, and if I know the song, follow the lyrics?

3. In reproduction, 1+1=3, why doesn't it make sense when talking about math?

4. Why does half and half never seem to spoil?

5. When did everyone start jogging? Were they jogging in the 60s like they do now?

6. Why don't we need to receive a parenting certification before having children?

7. Why does $5 get me a bag full of filling greasy food from a fast food place, but that $5 won't cover the cost of a salad at the same place?

8. Why does every job I get contain the same set of personalities as my previous job? It's the same script but with a different cast. Is this bizarro world, how can my former coworkers morph into new people and place themselves at my new place of employment?

9. Now this one is controversial: if you claim to be an animal lover, how can you pay thousands of dollars for a special breed animal when a perfectly good mixed breed languishes in an animal shelter and is available for less than $75.

Becoming a mom...part II

I had a boy!! So I'm 12 weeks into mommyhood and I'm getting more sleep and am becoming more used to my back to work routine of:

Getting up super early to breastfeed,

Taking my son to daycare,

Hurrying to work,

Pumping in the lactation room aka the 'milking room'; work; pump; work; pump...

Rushing to daycare to pick up my little guy who've I missed terribly,

Making dinner, spending time with my hubby, doing what I can before my 10:30 bedtime...

Sleeping for just a little while,

Being awakened by cries,

Nursing while nodding off and fending off the pain of exhaustion,

Looking over at hubby who's fast asleep, unable to control my jealousy,

Nodding back to sleep for what seems like 30 minutes to an hour

Awakened by cries

Getting up super early to breastfeed (repeat steps above)

Becoming a mom and other stuff

I'll be giving birth in 5 weeks and I'm incredibly  nervous about it. My life has changed so much over the past year I haven't had a chance to catch my breath. And now this. This is my first time admitting it on social media. I'm pregnant. I'm having a little boy. He'll be here next month. I hope I'll be a good mom. I know so little about it. I've been told that it'll come naturally. We'll see. I have a lot to give. But have never had to give it in this capacity.

I got married earlier this year, and while I'm still trying to understand what this marriage thing is all about. So much for my editor and writer musings I suppose. I've been so consumed with everything else. But one good thing is that my little brain is constantly observing the interesting things of my world.

I live mere minutes from the decision makers who are battling over who will win the government shutdown (yes, one side will "win" and the other will "lose"); the scene of the Navy Yard shootings that made headlines about two weeks ago; the woman who drove from Connecticut to DC and due to her bizarre actions lost her life; and most recently the poor man who set himself on fire on the National Mall and later succumbed to his injuries. This past month has been very emotionally trying in this area.

I feel very fortunate that, despite all the anxiety I've been feeling, I'm in a good place and I have a lot to look forward to. With so much going on in the world, I'm just happy to have my sanity (though it wanes a bit) to guide me through. I'm happy to have love. I'm happy to have a job where I feel somewhat needed. And I'm happy that I can look back on some rough times I've had the past few years and am now embarking on a journey I never imagined.

I'll be back with updates.

Back from the dead

So I visited this blog of mine and wasn't shocked to discover that my last post was almost a year ago. I know I've been ignoring my little musings headquarters. And the longer I went, the more bad I felt about the absence and the more overwhelmed I felt to make up for it. But I can't make up for it.

I can only pick up my virtual pen and start up again.

I've had plenty of musings this past year, most of which I've shared via email with friends or kept to myself, or jotted down in my various journals strewn from room to room.

Time just got away from me, and my creativity became imprisoned by life's other pressing issues and my unwillingness to wage a courageous battle against the many gremlins that kept me from my craft.

And somehow in the middle of all that, I met a great guy and got married! I'm still a little surprised by that one. (And if you care to go back and read about my stagnant love life, you'll see why....boy did I have a tough time.) But yep, I have a husband now and have been busy adjusting to the new role. I should cut myself some slack as I've only been wed about 4 months now. So far I would say marriage is a lot like I imagine "shacking up" to be. Except there's legal documents binding us together. His name is Dimitri and we're just starting a very long journey together.

I also have a new job, same place but a different office. I'm a communications advisor, which is the direction I've been wanting to head into for a long time now. I'm also the editor of the employee newsletter.  Yay for me! You should see me, interviewing, arranging photo shoots, creating issue lineups and trying to keep my coworkers informed and entertained as best I can. This is what I've been wanting. I hope to excel as I face new challenges (and I mean challenges!) and prove my worth amongst a very talented group of people.